Relationship and Marriage counseling can help you discover how suitable you are.
The two most important factors that decide how compatible you are as a couple are:
A similar level of psychological vitality and maturity and a similar ranking of Instinctual Variants.
What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the inherant energy or drive that are innately part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.
Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual type are preoccupied with the basic survival needs as they translate into our contemporary society, for example, money, food, accomodation, health, safety and comfort.
Being safe and physically comfortable are essential, and they will often bring their supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice bad lighting, uncomfortable seating, the room temperature, when the lunch break will be, and whether they will like the food provided. They also tend to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of pressing life necessities.
They are the most introverted of the types.
Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this variant have a strong desire for severity of experience and affection. The forthright riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a room they automatically gravitate toward people they feel magnetized to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can turn into intimacy junkies, often neglecting pressing matters or even basic hygiene if they are swept up in something that has captivated them. This gives a expansive exploratory philosophy to life, but can also give a lack of focus on one’s own achievements.
Social Instinct.
People of this type are focused on their interactions with other people and with the sense of value and esteem they receive from their participation in collective activities. These include occupation, relationships, side activities and clubs.
On entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the power structures and subtle politics between different people and social circles. They are subconsciously focused on other’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to touch base with others to feel secure, acknowledged and energised. They tend to love interacting with people, but they avoid intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.
Within each person, one of these Instincts will dominate. In fact the 3 traits can be ordered liked the sections of a cake, with the most dominant one at the top. The weakest one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These inherent instincts play a pivotal role in our relationships because personalities of the same type tend to share values to understand each other innately, and therefore feel very compatible.
In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.
For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.
For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.
